Learn to Let Go

What is good parenting? What is the good life?
Picking your battles for one–with your child, your partner, at work, in your inner life. The reality is we worry about the wrong things—stranger danger, tornadoes, terrorists—when the real threats to our lives are under the kitchen sink for toddlers, in the car driving to work, or the stress of doing too much too fast and the toll it takes on our bodies and our families.

Letting go is easier than it sounds, but it can be done, beginning with recognizing what we can and cannot control, and it boils down to this: you can only control yourself, no one else. Not your child, your partner, nor even your newborn babe who wakes every 2 hours for feeding (and may or may not be satisfied with it).

The trick is understanding that for a big life of risk and adventure, of happy resilient children, and loving connections with those we love, we must rely on ourselves (who we can control!) to make it happen. We can model an abundant life when we take care of ourselves even in the face of too little time or money. We can be present to the fleeting transcendent moments in a child’s delight, a belly laugh with a beloved, connections with friends and family, the beauty of a summer waxing moon—all available to anyone willing to be present.

Don’t waste precious psychic energy and worry on the things you cannot control, while the things you can are right there, within an arm’s reach, waiting for you to pay attention and grab it.

Let go.

In the long run it doesn’t matter if you prevail or are proved right. What matters is the willingness to move with the forces of life that present themselves day by day—the good, the bad, and the ugly–all that make up a rich, if sometimes complicated, life. Consider yourself a good enough (not perfect) parent, partner, or friend. Use your inner compass to navigate with, it’s all yours, you are in control! Consider yourself blessed and be ready to pass it on.

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Comments

  1. Loved and Appreciated this post so much!

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